Page 25 - C.A.L.L. #23 - Spring 2004

KALEIDOSCOPE
The Communitarian Scene from all Over and Under
Compiled (and partly translated) by Joel Dorkam

Dear Reader,

When getting ready to give birth to another one of these funny whatsoevers, (hello
there, is anybody reading me?) I usually make a choice of some peculiar topic and
begin reading some choice newsletters of yours – hoping to discover some exquisite, much relevant tidbit.

This time, leafing through “Communities” No. 118 of summer 2003, the theme “Lovers in Communities” (a
favourite of mine – and yours?) jumped into my biased eyes. From the very first introduction line by editor
Diane Leafe Christian, my mind was captured by the sheer honesty of the expression of her feelings – and the
precision of her observations. I very much hope she won’t mind my borrowing a few excerpts from the
wealth of this magnificent issue:

Community is for Lovers...

BY DIANA LEAFE CHRISTIAN - Editor of Communities magazine.
• Intense community scrutiny of your love
Standing alone in the moonlight, peering up at and sex life can heal and enhance your
the bedroom window. Is your still beloved up relationships.
there with someone new-one of your community • You can have more than one lover - and
mates? (Can you bear another moment of this?) all remain dear friends.
Or it's you up in that bedroom-and you know your • You can dearly love your community
new love's ex is in pain down below. How can mates of the opposite sex - and all be
you face this person tomorrow? How do you celibate.
balance the loyalties of friendship with the
richness of romance? While the intentional community setting tends to
What if you and your partner break up in sorrow make exploring new forms of relationship
and disillusionment, or get divorced how can you relatively easier, and non-traditional relationships
stay in the community? Does one of you have to tend to be more common in communities than in
leave? the mainstream, plenty of communities -
Or you and your partner are fine, but can your probably most - are comprised of single folks and
relationship take all this public attention? With monogamous couples. Yet non-monogamists are
everyone knowing everyone else's business, often good writers with fascinating stories to tell,
where's the privacy, the "space" for your and we've got two such tales in this issue.
relationship?
(We'll leave to a future issue other important
The authors in this special section – lovers all - issues: How do partners find time to nurture and
explore how community affects marriage and enjoy each other when they're obligated to so
love partnerships and friendships. They observe many damn meetings and community labor pro-
that: jects? fue the benefits and pressures the same for
• Community - that magnifying mirror - gay couples? What happens when one partner is
makes good relationships juicier and eager to join the community and the other isn't,
shaky ones shake apart faster. or one is far more interested in community life
• Neither of you has to leave the group and the other is more reclusive? If you have a
when you break up. Impartial, loving story along these lines - let us know!)
community mates can help you both heal
more quickly. Meanwhile, here's what our current authors -
• You and your partner can create new monogamous, non-monogamous, and monastic
forms of love relationship. Your community - have to say. Enjoy!
mates can support you in this.

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