Page 12 - C.A.L.L. #21 - Spring 2003

Taken from The Plough, Summer 2002
Food For Thought

Passionate, funny, shocking, and ultimately enlightening, Eduardo Galeano‘s mock lessons for a world run amok are captivating
curious readers all over œ and convincing them that to make sense of our world of absurd paradoxes and connections, you often need to
look at it from the most uncomfortable angle.

The selections below are taken from Galeano‘s book Upside Down.

Points of View
đ From the point of view of the owl, the bat, the bohemian, and the thief, sunset is time for breakfast.
đ Rain is bad news for tourists and good news for farmers.
đ As far as the natives are concerned, it‘s the tourists who are picturesque.
đ To the indigenous peoples of the Caribbean, Christopher Columbus, with his plumed cap and red velvet cape, was the biggest
parrot they had ever seen.

Language

In the Victorian Period, one did not speak of trousers in the presence of an unmarried woman. Today, there are certain things one can‘t
say in the face of public opinion:
đ Capitalism wears the stage name —market economy“
đ Imperialism is called —globalization“
đ The victims of imperialism are called —developing countries“
đ Opportunism is called —pragmatism“
đ The expulsion of poor children from the school system is measured by the —dropout rate“
đ The right of bosses to lay off workers with neither warning, severance, nor explanation is called —a flexible labor market“
đ When thieves belong to a good family, they‘re —kleptomaniacs“
đ —accidents“ are what they call crimes committed by cars

Religion Class

When I went to Rome for the first time I no longer believed in God, and for me earth was the only heaven and the only hell. But my
memory of God the father from my childhood wasn‘t a bad one, and deep inside I kept a special place for God the son, the rebel of
Galilee who defied the imperial city where my Alitalia flight was then landing. Of the Holy Ghost, I confess, not much stayed with me,
just a vague recollection of a white dove…As soon as I walked into the Rome airport a huge sign loomed before my eyes. BANK OF THE
HOLY GHOST. I was young and it made quite an impression on me that this was what the third member of the Trinity was up to.

The Looking-Glass World

In the world as it is, the looking-glass world, the countries that guard the peace also make and sell the most weapons. The most
prestigious banks launder the most drug money and harbor the most stolen cash. The most successful industries are the most poisonous
for the planet. And saving the environment is the brilliant endeavor of the very companies that profit from annihilating it. Those who
kill the most people in the shortest time win immunity and praise, as do those who destroy the most nature at the lowest cost.

Dusk of a Civilization

No rain, except acid rain. No parks, just parking lots. No partners, only partnerships. Companies instead of nations. Consumers
instead of citizens. No people, only audiences. No relations, except public relations. No visions, just televisions. To praise a flower: —It‘s
so perfect, it looks like an artificial one.“

The Right to Rave
đ the air shall be cleansed of all poisons except those born of human fears and passions;
đ in the streets, cars shall be run over by dogs;
đ people shall not be driven by cars, or programmed by computers, or bought by supermarkets, or watched by televisions;
đ the TV set shall no longer be the most important member of the family;
đ people shall work for a living instead of living for work;
đ in no country shall young men who refuse to go to war go to jail, rather only those who want to make war;
đ cooks shall not believe that lobsters love to be boiled alive;
đ historians shall not believe that countries love to be invaded;
đ politicians shall not believe that the poor love to eat promises;
đ no one shall be considered a hero or a fool for doing what he believes is right instead of what serves him best;
đ food shall not be a commodity nor shall communications be a business, because food and communication are human rights;
đ no one shall die of hunger, because no one shall die from overeating;
đ education shall not be the privilege of those who can pay;
đ the police shall not be the curse of those who cannot pay;
đ no one shall be taken seriously who can‘t make fun of himself.

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